The Young Adulthood Guide to Happiness: How to Ask for Advice but Politely Disregard Everything They Say

There comes a time in adulthood when you realize that everyone has an opinion about what you should do. When you were a child, it made sense to listen to the advice of others. However, in adulthood you have the right to finally choose to politely not give a f*#k.

What happens though when years of listening causes us to look to others to know if we are going the right way? It’s the paradox of young adulthood you see… we can choose to disregard everything we have been told and do what we want; yet we still deeply crave to look to others for guidance, for support, or to tell us “hell no” when we are about to meet up with that shitty ex that no one liked... LITERALLY NO ONE.

Maybe we will never grow out of that need to be guided. Even the wisest people will grow and expand with the help from others. Perhaps the point is not to stop listening but rather begin understanding that blind acceptance of right and wrong is not what creates new experiences.

You see, life will give us experiences that make us feel lost. Instead of problems with crappy exes, it will be asking how we know it is the right time to move on. Instead of asking if it is safe to eat expired food, we wonder if it’s too soon to have children or get married or make a career change. People will likely share their opinions on all of the above. They will tell you their experiences and all the ways in which you should avoid their mistakes. But that is just it... It is their life experience and their mistakes and that does not necessarily mean they will be yours.

At some point, we have to cut the crap of looking to others when we know what is right for us. We have to learn that we have this thing called intuition and feelings in our gut that will tell us what will work even when all the advice seems to be pointing elsewhere. That it’s not too late or too soon to move on from a person or make a drastic career change.

We all need guidance. However, the longer you live, you realize that you are responsible for your own happiness. You, yourself should understand what feels right to you. Maybe you’ll mess up or maybe you’ll make a terrible decision in spite of people advising you otherwise. And when you f#*k up, the best and most beautiful thing about it is that you will have done so on your own account. You will not have missed out on life because someone told you to stay away. You will not have to second guess for once that you are exercising your freedom to experience and grow. You will have made choices living your life rather than wondering if you are merely following someone else’s footsteps.