We always want love to be this beautiful, perfect thing. It is why we gravitate towards things like this:
“Love is Patient, Love is Kind”
We want others to love us in that exact way. We expect it actually. But we get a humongous slap of reality when people aren’t this perfect vision of love. Love is more than a phrase like that one that is plastered on every girl’s Pinterest. That verse in particular goes onto to say: “(love) keeps no records of wrongs.” If you look back on friendships or relationship, the hardest part about loving people is the fact that, just like us, they don’t always poop rainbows and they screw up. The fact that they are not perfect to love is annoying. It turns us into a Mean Girl like Regina George because their screw-ups go against everything we thought about love.
Love bothers us. Love is not as open as we would like. Love bails on plans and has mood swings. And Love definitely does not always give us the patience we need. But this is not middle school anymore. The people in our lives should not be subjected to metaphorically being shoved out from our lunch table because we have decided to keep a burn book of everything they have managed to do wrong.
You have choices in each relationship: a choice to say how you feel rather than storing it in your diary for later; a choice to walk away from people that continuously overlook you and your relationship or evolve lovingly with the person. Maintaining any relationship be it with a friend or a lover, will prove to be just as hard as letting them go. It involves releasing our expectations, accepting people for who they are, and most importantly, letting the past fricken go.
There is a difference between being ignorant to the toxicity of others and understanding what previous wrongs are worth keeping record of. It is time to release the people we love from their past f#@k ups and let them back to our lunch table.